My Mother. She tops the list of things I will never understand. She has quit smoking which is great. Now she is trying to badger my sister into doing it as well. It is not a pretty sight. She has been riding her to set a quit date and telling her how to do it. My sister has started to get mad at her* because of this behaviour. This is not surprising as my mother’s personality is such that if she is suffering then everyone should also suffer. When we were kids, if my mother was up we all had to be up. If she was in a pissy mood then she made sure that we were also in a pissy mood.
Yesterday I was talking to her and she told me that she had been out with my sister (Kathy) all day. They had gone shopping etc and when they got back to the car she asked Kathy to light a cigarette so she could smell it. Then she asked her for a cigarette and Kathy said she did not have any. She relayed all of this to me and I became concerned because she has just dropped down from 21 mg of nicotine to 14 mg. I suggested that she may have dropped down to abruptly and that perhaps she needed to add some more nicotine to the mix. I have been very supported of my mother through this process. I have given her tons of support, advice and listened to her vent. I am invested in seeing her succeed as the results will not be good.
After arguing with me for a while about why she thought she didn’t need more nicotine she told me it was a test for my sister. I said exactly what kind of test – to see if she would give you a cigarette? My mother said no. After going around and around this she finally said it was a test to see if she was still smoking. Yes, you read that right. My mother asked my sister for a cigarette to determine if my sister was still smoking. I could not believe it.
Finally, I said to my mother, I have a really good way for you to find out if she is smoking. My mother got all excited and squealed for me to tell her. I said why don’t you phone her, wait for it, and ask her! You know use your communication skills. If you want to know something ASK!!!
I deserve a freaking medal for having survived this fucked up family!
*And for good reason.