Today is my 45th birthday. I can hardly believe it. I thought I would feel old at 45 but the truth is that I still feel like I am 10 years old. Part of this might be due to the contact with my family lately. My sister called today. I did not answer the phone. I had no intention of listening to her crap today. My mother told me I should call her back after all, in my mother’s opinion, Kathy had reached out and made the first move and I should call her back. I told her I would not be calling her back as I did not really want to be yelled at on my birthday. Normally I would not defy my mother but I did today. I told my mother that until my sister gets help I will not be calling her. She called again, Deb answered and told her I was in bed.

Deb worked so hard to make my birthday good after what happened at my family birthday party. She made me a lovely 3 layer cake with whip cream and mandarin oranges. Exactly what I wanted. Plus she got me some very thoughtful gifts. Knowing how much I love my tea she got me a new glass tea pot and a lovely hand-painted mug. She got me all sorts of fancy loose teas which I will completely enjoy. I commented that I needed a bigger purse – only once and she found me one with a really long strap – just the way I like them!

I am very lucky and I so grateful for my partner and our furry family. Everyone is loving and I am enjoying every moment of cuddling and love I can get. The one thing I have learned in 45 years is that it is important to mark and celebrate the everyday occurrences that enhance our lives. It is these little things that give us the energy to get through the hard days. We also live a life of kindness. Being kind as much as possible creates more of those moments that are central to living life.

Today, the good things far outweigh the bad things. I am in a place in my life where I can control, to a certain degree, what happens to me. I can also control my outlook and to pass around the kindness. Setting boundaries that protect me and my family from toxic family of origin members will be done. Maybe I have learned more than I realize.


5 thoughts on “My 45th Birthday

  1. Happy belated birthday! I’m sorry I muss the actual day – I spent my evening yesterday off the computer!

    What really strikes me about your post is how you’ve managed to break the cycle from your toxic family of origin to the family you’ve chosen for yourself. It’s very clear that you’ve chosen a partner who loves you for you and who treats you with the love and respect and care that you deserve. She listens to you and treats you well! So often we repeat our family histories when we grow up, without even realizing it, and it makes me happy to see that that is not always the case. Happy birthday, Chris, and happy every other day of the year too!

    1. Well I am not always perfect at this but I try. I get sucked in to my family of origin crap at times. I try hard to recognize it before it happens but I am not always successful. Sometimes with the distance I have a little time. This time though I am pretty clear on what I am not going to put up with. Thanks for the birthday wishes!

  2. Happy belated birthday, Chris. I’m glad Deb and the critters made it special, and you chose to block those who might have cast a black cloud over it.
    Mmmmmm…cake with mandarin oranges and whipped cream sounds delicious!

  3. Happy Birthday! Even if I may be a tad late.

    Good for you for enjoying the day and not letting anyone get you down. Much deserved!

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